today...

looking back-
over my shoulder

i can see us smiling
i can see all the lonliness
i've ever felt

i can feel all the sadness you could
ever hold-

wondering where time has taken us-

nostalgia sweeps over me as i peer
into our pasts-

i am sad for all the words i never
said- for all the feelings..
emotions i was too naive to portray to you-

but i have no regret --
for every wrong there was a right-
and all those mistakes have brought
me to this self i am today

relations between women in 19th century america

"i wanted so to put my arms round my girl of all the girls in the world and tell her... i love her as wives do love their husbands, as friends who have taken each other for life - and believe in her as i believe in my god... if i didn't love you do you suppose i'd care about anything or have ridiculous notions and panics and behave like an old fool who ought to know better. i'm going to hang on to your skirts.... you can't get away from [my] love."- Molly Hallock Foote

there's always australia

i write about these good bye's way too often..

but life is so fleeting
and so are you..

another friend lost to the masses
there's little chance we will ever re-unite..

i miss you already
but i know it will fade with time..

with the memory of your face..

choke

it's the last frontier to conquer, other people, strangers, the jungle of their arms and legs, hair and skin, the smells and moans that is everybody you haven't done. the great unknowns. the last forest to devastate. here's everything you've only imagined. - chuck palahnuik

and i told her..
i don't feel i know who i am..
as if i've never known..