so numb

handicapped by my feelings
w/ blood running down my arm-
it's brighter than i imagined it would be-

wishing i could cry then
maybe i would feel more alive

i almost wish the cuts were deep enough to drain
my body of its soul

i thought the razor would bring back
feeling to my inanimate body

yet i still feel dead -
what will make this numbness fade--

is death really so far away?