broken wood on my finger

so many friendly faces surrounding me
and all i feel is doom

the booze is not helping
the fun is not ceasing

i want to know how you feel
but is there any way to have an actual rational thought or genuine feeling right now.

pictures can't remind me of the good times we had
because it was only you that was smiling

broken hearts and disillusioned sexual fantasies
make this night in every way.

i wish you were here
and when i say you i don't mean them and i don't mean you
i am missing the person i haven't met or someone i don't remember
i am missing that feeling of being whole. that feeling of comfort

where has all my time gone.
all the memories i don't recall
all these so called good times that you said i had.