did i just really fuck this up..

did you love me?..

i thought it wasn't right..
i felt like we didn't fit..

but i wasn't trying..
i was throwing away some of the puzzle pieces when you weren't looking

you really loved me..
the good, the bad and the ugly
and i just couldn't accept that.

who can't accept love?

i am so selfish to the point that i couldn't let you love me how you wanted.
i had to have it my way. i ruined it.

and as soon as we pulled down the umbrella terms, i wanted you.

as soon as you stopped loving me. i missed you.
i'm so stubborn. so damn stubborn and selfish.

even now the phone rang and when i saw it was you i was so happy until i heard your voice, so sad. yet you still wanted to see me and i just wouldn't make the effort to meet on your ground..
what the fuck am i doing?

i wouldn't be happy with you.

i'm happy when i think of you.